This Time, I'm Saving Myself

I accompany my husband, Michael Yates, to a stationed assignment on a remote island.

Out at sea, a sudden storm hits. The ship capsizes and begins to sink.

As the commanding officer, my husband gives the last life vest to his so-called godsister, Naomi Hollister.

I don't cry or scream. I just watch silently as he carefully fastens the straps around her body.

In my past life, I had clutched my pregnant belly and begged him for help. After a brief hesitation, he finally put the vest on me.

But Naomi was swept away by the waves, and her body later washed up on shore. Only half of it remained.

Michael insisted it wasn't my fault. He also said that saving me was his duty, both morally and professionally. He even took leave to stay by my side before I gave birth.

But when my water broke in the dead of night, he pushed me into the sea. His eyes were bloodshot and burning with hatred.

"Leah, if it weren't for you, Mimi would still be alive! Did you really have to force me to give you the vest when you were just pregnant? Couldn't you have waited a little longer? Why do you get to live? Go down there and die with her!"

I drown, and fish tear my body apart. I die without even a full corpse left behind.

And then, I open my eyes. I'm back on the day of the storm.

A wild wind stirred up the waves, and they lunged at the ship once more. I, Leah Dursley, clutched my stomach and clung firmly to my seat, too afraid to move.

The storm crashed its way inside through the shattered windows.

The familiar scene of chaos in front of me made me shudder involuntarily.

I had been reborn, and not only that, I had been reborn at this critical moment.

The security officer of Michael Yates stumbled toward me, holding the last life jacket. "Wear this, Mrs. Yates! Hurry!"

Before he could hand it to me, Michael rushed over to Naomi Hollister, looking grim.

The security officer realized that there was someone else who wasn't wearing a life jacket. His hand froze in mid-air, and he looked conflicted.

On the one hand was his commander's wife, while on the other was the woman whom the commander treated like a younger sister. Anyone in the security officer's place would have felt conflicted.

When Naomi saw Michael, she immediately began whimpering beside me, "I'm so scared, Mikey…"

Naomi was drenched, and as she hugged herself, she blinked her huge, sparkling eyes at Michael. She looked like a frightened rabbit.

Michael pulled Naomi into his arms, as if he couldn't see me. He comforted her gently. "It's alright, Mimi. I'm here."

The wind continued to howl, and he shielded Naomi firmly in his arms. He didn't seem to see me, even though I was just a couple of steps away.

I was pregnant with his child, and I was holding on with difficulty to the railings as the ship shook.

When the security officer urged me once more, Michael finally glanced impatiently at me.

"I told you that the weather was bad, but you insisted on coming with me! If it weren't because I'd been waiting for your prenatal checkup, we would never have been in this storm. Now the entire ship is in danger. Are you happy?"

He stood in his military uniform in front, looking indignant and yelling at me as if I were a soldier who had made a mistake.

Upon hearing him, the other family members of military personnel who had treated me with respect at first began resenting me.

"I wondered why we hadn't set off after waiting for so many days. We were waiting for her!"

"Why doesn't she stay put since she's pregnant? Even if she wants to die, she shouldn't drag us down with her!"

They clutched their life jackets, trembling and speaking through gritted teeth. They looked as if they were about to come and slap me.

The older woman behind me even spat in my face.

There was a warm stickiness on my cheek, but I couldn't do anything except shield my stomach and let the spit slide off slowly.