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The Alpha's Desperate Regret Novel Cover

The Alpha's Desperate Regret

"A monster like you could never be my Luna." Those words shatter Elara Voss on the night she finally shifts... into the forbidden Shadow Wolf. Rejected by the Alpha King and cast out as a cursed monster, Elara flees into the rogue lands with nothing but humiliation burning in her chest. But when Kairos Blackthorn comes hunting for her, he doesn't find the broken omega he rejected. He finds a queen. In a moment of fury, Elara does the impossible-she marks the Alpha King instead. Now the bond is reversed. The king who rejected her feels every ounce of her pain... her rage... and her growing power. As war brews between brothers and ancient enemies rise from the shadows, Kairos must fight to win back the mate he destroyed before Elara's darkness consumes them all.
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Chapter 5

~KAIROS' POV~

My wolf was trying to tear me apart from the inside.

That's the only way I can describe it. For two straight days he'd been snarling nonstop, pacing behind my ribs like a caged animal, claws scraping my heart every time I tried to pull in a full breath.

GO. FIND. HER.

I was sitting in the dark of my chambers staring at the moon through the tall window. It hung there looking cold, like it knew exactly what it had done to me.

I'd stood in the circle at the feast. I'd said the words out loud. Called her a monster in front of the whole pack. Banished her. So why did it feel like I was the one locked in a cage that kept getting smaller?

I held my hands up in front of my face. They were shaking. Badly.

The mate bond felt like someone had wrapped a steel wire around my soul and was yanking it tighter every few minutes. I could feel her everything.

The spike of terror when the guards started chasing her. The sting of sharp rocks cutting into her palms and knees. Worst of all, that last look she gave me right before she disappeared into the trees. Like I'd reached inside her chest and crushed whatever light was left.

"I did what I had to," I muttered to the empty room. My voice sounded thin, like I didn't even believe it myself.

The prophecy was carved into every stone of this pack. A Shadow Wolf brings ruin. My father died whispering those words. My mother built her whole life around making sure they never came true. I'm the Alpha. I don't get to gamble the safety of hundreds of people on a girl who, until two nights ago, hadn't even carried a scent worth noticing.

But my wolf didn't give a damn about prophecies or duty.

MATE.

The word slammed through my skull so hard I winced and pressed the heel of my hand against my temple.

YOU BROKE THE MATE. YOU ARE THE MONSTER.

A soft knock. The door opened before I could snarl at whoever it was.

My mother, Elder Mara slipped inside carrying a silver tray with one steaming cup. She glanced around at the wreckage of my room, the chair I'd thrown against the wall, the deep claw gouges in the desk, the shredded tapestry still hanging in strips.

Her mouth pressed into that familiar thin line.

"You're brooding again, Kairos," she said, voice soft like she was talking to me when I was ten and had fallen off my horse. "You did the right thing. The pack is safe now. That girl was a curse wearing pretty skin."

"She's my fated mate," I snapped. It came out rough, like I'd swallowed gravel. "I felt it, Mother. The bond snapped into place the second our eyes met. Why didn't you ever tell me it could be her? You knew her mother. You knew the bloodline."

She set the tray down carefully. The little clink of porcelain felt too loud in the quiet.

"Because the moon likes to play cruel games with us, my son. The Shadow Wolf is a parasite. It mimics the mate bond to worm its way close to the Alpha. It wants to hollow you out and wear your skin."

She poured the tea. The sharp, bitter smell of cold herbs and something metallic underneath hit me immediately.

"I don't feel protected," I said, rubbing the center of my chest where the bond kept throbbing like a fresh bruise. "I feel like I'm dying."

"That's only exhaustion," she answered smoothly, sliding the cup closer. "You haven't slept properly in days. You forgot your morning tea. Drink. It'll clear the noise in your head."

I stared down into the dark liquid. I'd been drinking this since I was fifteen. It's supposed to keep an Alpha steady, keep the beast from taking the wheel. I wrapped my fingers around the warm cup and took a long swallow. It tasted like old pennies and wilted leaves.

Almost right away a thick, heavy fog started creeping through my thoughts. The constant screaming in my skull dialed down. My wolf snarled once more, then slumped into a corner of my mind, eyes dull and defeated.

"Why's it so bitter lately?" I asked, frowning into the cup.

Mara didn't even blink. "New blend. Stronger. To help with the stress. You know how wild and dangerous your wolf gets when he's upset. We can't afford that right now."

She reached over and patted the back of my hand. Her skin felt thin, dry, like old paper.

"Sleep, Kairos. Forget the girl. She's probably already dead out there in the rogue lands. It's kinder this way." She left.

The door clicked shut and the silence rushed back in louder than any screaming.

I leaned back, waiting for the familiar numbness to settle in like it always did. Usually the tea turned everything gray and far away. Tonight the fog wouldn't stick. The bond was too fresh, too raw, clawing through the haze like it refused to be drugged.

And then, out of nowhere, a spark lit up inside my head.

It wasn't mine.

It was a laugh. Light. Real. The kind a woman makes when she finally feels safe enough to let go. Warmth followed it, soft and golden, wrapping around the memory like a blanket.

She was happy. Without me.

The realization hit like someone drove a knife straight into my stomach and twisted it.

She's with someone.

Jealousy slammed through me so hard it punched straight past the tea's dulling effect. My wolf surged awake, eyes blazing red in the dark of my mind.

NOT US. SHE IS NOT WITH US.

A flash came through the bond, clear as daylight. A scarred male hand brushing hair off her shoulder. A feeling of home, of safety, aimed at someone who wasn't me.

I shot to my feet. The teacup flew off the table and shattered against the stone floor. The fog in my head ripped apart like wet paper.

"I'm coming for you," I growled into the empty room. Prophecy or not, the bond was winning. I didn't care if she was a curse, I just wanted the screaming in my head to stop.

I called the elite guards to the border. Told them we were tracking a rogue threat but didn't say a word about my mate. The second I shifted and my paws hit the forest floor, I knew what I really was.

A starving man chasing the only thing that could fill him.

We ran for hours. The bond pulled me like a silver thread deeper into rogue territory. Air turned colder. Shadows got thicker. But her scent grew stronger with every mile.

Cedar. Pine. And then... her.

Not the blank nothing she used to carry. This was ozone after lightning, dark vanilla smoke. Sharp enough to make my head spin. The scent of a queen.

We reached the clearing. I slowed, paws silent on the pine needles.

And there she was.

Standing in the center of a ring of shadows, black fur gleaming like poured ink under moonlight. Powerful. Radiant. Happy.

And then I saw who was standing with her.

Kael. My brother.

The one I'd exiled years ago. The one I'd convinced myself was better off forgotten. He was touching her hair. Looking at her like she hung the damn moon. And she was letting him.

The rage that exploded inside me burned away the last dregs of the tea. It burned away reason.

I shifted back to human as I stepped out of the tree line. My guards fanned out behind me. I didn't feel like an Alpha. I felt like a monster wearing a crown.

Kael shoved her behind him. Claws slid free with a metallic snit.

"Get away from her, Kael," I snarled.

The ground seemed to vibrate under the weight of my voice.

I looked at Elara.

She wasn't the trembling girl from the feast anymore. She stood tall, silver eyes glowing with something dark and ancient. She didn't look at me with hurt, or love, or even anger. She looked at me like I was filth stuck to the bottom of her boot.

"She's coming home," I said. My voice dropped low, thick with possession. "Even if I have to drag her back in chains."

I flicked my fingers. The guards moved, silver flashed as they drew the heavy cold-iron shackles from their belts.

I didn't care if she hated me forever. I didn't care if the whole pack feared what I'd become. I just needed the burning to stop. And she was the only thing that could make it stop.

I was Alpha. King. And my word was law.

I took one last step onto rogue soil, pulling the full power of the Eclipse Pack into my lungs.

"Elara," I roared. The Alpha command crashed across the clearing like thunder. It was a command no wolf could disobey. "KNEEL."

I waited for her knees to buckle. Waited for her to collapse under the weight of my will like every other wolf in my presence.

Instead my guards hit the dirt instantly. Even Kael buckled, his teeth grinding as he fought the weight of my will.

But Elara...She didn't even blink.

She stood perfectly still, shadows curling lazily around her fingers like pets. A small, mocking smile curved her lips as my command rolled over her and did absolutely nothing.

My heart didn't just drop-it stopped.

"I don't take orders from you anymore," she said.

Her voice was ice, and it froze the very blood in my veins.

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