Sorry, You’re Not Worth Waiting For

Samuel could no longer tolerate it when he heard Sophia's call.

He raised his hand and absently touched my face, once again reminding me, “Cecilia, it’s just three months. Wait for me, the breakup is only temporary.”

I stared at the necklace around his neck and quickly snatched it away. "It seems to be broken. I'll take it off and fix it for you."

Samuel waved dismissively and hurried towards the love of his life.

I pulled out my phone and called Professor Marshall, “Professor Marshall, it’s Cecilia. Is that exchange spot you mentioned still available? I agree to go abroad.”

Not even three months, I didn't want to wait three days. Unfortunately, the procedures for going abroad were quite complicated and couldn't be completed in just three days. My passport and visa were ready, and the school told me I could depart in a week. In seven days, Samuel and I would never see each other again.

As I was immersed in packing, I received a call from my best friend, Wendy. She was yelling angrily on the other end, “Cecilia, what’s going on? Why did I see Samuel and Sophia on a date at the Prudential Center? Aren’t you two together? How could he be dating someone else behind your back?!”

Hardly anyone knew about my secret relationship with Samuel, and Wendy was one of them.

“If I didn’t know you and how much you’ve always loved him, I would’ve thought you were after his money. He’s never acknowledged your relationship in front of anyone in these years. He’s no good!”

Hearing my prolonged silence, she panicked and immediately apologized.

I smiled and reassured her, telling her I wouldn’t be sad anymore. Wendy was surprised and quickly asked, “Don’t lie to me. Are you really over him?”

"Really, don’t worry about it, I..."

I thought back to the foolish things I had done. Whenever I saw Samuel and Sophia together, I would masochistically snap pictures and endlessly look at them when alone.

Seeing them so intimately together, seeing how perfectly they matched, I used to cry my heart out in the dead of night.

Every past struggle, self-loathing, and futile pleading, Wendy knew it all. She tried to persuade me countless times to come to my senses. But continuing my secret relationship with Samuel was like drinking poison to quench thirst. Even knowing I’d ultimately be the one in pain, I couldn’t resist the temptation.

I put on my headphones, carrying a large box filled with the expensive but useless gifts Samuel had given me over the years. I planned to throw them all away.

Wendy’s incessant chatter continued in my ears as I walked down the stairs, smiling and planning to tell her that I’d agreed to the exchange program and ask if she could see me off in a week.

To my surprise, I ran right into Samuel and Sophia downstairs.

Samuel hesitated, intending to approach me, but Sophia suddenly grabbed his arm and slid her hand naturally around his.

“Cecilia, what a surprise to see you here.”

She stood there, dressed in an elegant pearl-white dress, looking so graceful and beautiful that it was hard to look away. No wonder every single time, Samuel would leave me to choose her.

I had encountered this kind of situation more than once. In the past, seeing Samuel and Sophia together would turn my face into a mask of pain.

Samuel, worried that I might stare hard at Sophia and scare her again this time, quickly stepped in front of her.

I took off my headphones and didn’t end the call with Wendy but switched it to speaker.

I glanced at her lightly, “This is downstairs from my dorm. I just came to throw some trash.”

Wendy had already heard Sophia greeting me and couldn’t wait to shout through the phone, “Cecilia, hurry up and dump the stuff! I’ve lined up a date with a hottie from Brandeis University. Latecomers have to drink!”

I couldn’t help but laugh, that little trickster, always coming to my rescue.

“Sorry, guys, I have plans and need to go now.”

With that, I ignored Samuel’s stiff body as I tossed the box into the dumpster.

As I turned, someone suddenly grabbed my wrist.