Never Meant to Be

Before Valentine's Day, I received a message from Caleb Spencer.

It was a screenshot of a seven-figure bill for a necklace. It was meant for me, but he bought it for another woman.

I didn't cry or make a scene. Instead, I quietly kept cleaning the house.

Since we got married, every month brought new gossip about Caleb. Some came from the internet, some from nosy friends, and some even from Caleb himself.

By now, I'd become the joke of the whole social circle.

But it didn't matter. This life wasn't going to last much longer anyway.

'My name is Lily Preston, and the day before Valentine's Day is my wedding anniversary.'

Like clockwork, Caleb Spencer's message came in right at midnight. It always did.

This year, it was a payment confirmation.

Seven figures. He bought my senior thesis project… and gave it to another woman.

Blood dripped from my nose onto the phone screen, blooming slowly. I turned off the screen, grabbed a tissue to stop the bleeding, and resumed cleaning the apartment.

[Got nothing to say?]

His messages kept coming. Clearly, he wasn't ready to let this go.

I sighed and typed back, [Don't get anyone pregnant.]

Seconds after I hit send, the phone rang.

His low laugh came through the receiver, cold and mocking. It was as if I were the one who cheated.

"Lily, you've got thirty minutes. Bring a box of condoms to Room 8301 at Capitol Tower."

My nails dug into my palm. I bit down hard on my lip until I tasted blood.

"Why me?"

He scoffed. "Didn't you just say not to get anyone pregnant? Be a good wife, Mrs. Spencer."

He spat out the last two words like they disgusted him.

I hung up and pressed my fingers to my temples. I felt exhausted. I popped a pill into my mouth without checking the label and swallowed it dry. Then, I grabbed my coat and headed out.

The city streets were eerily quiet at that hour.

At the 24-hour pharmacy, the sleepy pharmacist looked at the box I handed over and said gently, "Sweetheart, if a man sends you out in the middle of the night to buy these, he's not worth your time."

I nodded slightly. "He really isn't."

But what I didn't say was that I didn't have much time left anyway.

I had a rare, genetic disease. It was incurable, and most who had it didn't live past 30.

-

Room 8301 at Capitol Tower was Caleb's regular suite.

Every time the tabloids caught him on video, it was the same scene—him, with a different woman on his arm, walking into that same room.

Even after getting exposed, he never changed the suite.

It was as if he didn't care who saw.

He cheated so openly and confidently, that somehow I was the one who became the joke. I was always the one everyone laughed at.

Kayla Lewis opened the door.

One side of her robe slipped off her shoulder, revealing a wide stretch of pale skin marked with scattered red spots. The bold, unashamed signs of intimacy made her look especially seductive.

"Wow, Mrs. Spencer. You actually came."

Her smile was bright, almost innocent, like she'd practiced it in the mirror.

"But you're really late," she added, holding up the box I brought. "Boss couldn't wait. You can take this back."

Her smile was sweet, her expression soft and innocent. It held just the right amount of naïveté to hide the desire and greed underneath. It was like she'd studied a reference, trained herself to mimic every glance and smile. Everything about her felt eerily familiar.

I'd heard she was a junior from my department, just graduated last year.

I looked away and nodded, already turning to leave.

But her voice rang out behind me. "Oh, one more thing, Mrs. Spencer—if he doesn't love you, why keep throwing yourself at him? It's pathetic."

She tilted her head and gave me a pitying look.

"As a woman, here's some advice. Just divorce him already. I mean, look at your skin. It's dark and rough. How are you supposed to compete with someone like me?"

I glanced down at the back of my hand.

Faint lines had already started to show—rough, aging faster than they should. But I was only 29 years old.

"You're shamlessly clinging to the title of being Mr. Spencer's wife," she said. "Don't you think that's a little sad?"

I let out a soft laugh and ignored her. A tight, aching pressure rose in my chest, and all I wanted was to get out of there.

That was when Caleb rushed out of the room. His shirt wasn't even wrinkled.

He grabbed my arm.

"You really don't have anything to say?"

There it was again. That same question.

I shook my head and held up the plastic bag.

"You said you didn't need it. So what's left to say?"

I paused, then decided to say one more thing.

"Oh, right…"

Something flickered in Caleb's eyes. Hope, maybe. Even in the dim hallway, I could see it light up for a second.

"What is it?"

I turned to Kayla and smiled.

"I've seen a few of the recent headlines. Seems like Ms. Lewis is always in them. You must really like her. If that's the case, why let people call her the homewrecker? Before there's a baby involved, maybe you should put a ring on it."

Caleb's expression changed instantly.

"Oh, I see. Now you're telling me what to do? Put a ring on it? And what about you? What, are you asking for a divorce?" He stepped closer, voice rising. "Let me make this clear, Lily. That'll only happen over my dead body."

Doors started opening along the hallway. Neighbors poked their heads out, curious about the noise.

Someone recognized him. I could hear the whispers and feel the stares, but I didn't react.

I just tilted my head thoughtfully, then looked back at Kayla.

"You heard him. There's nothing I can do. It's not that I won't divorce him."

-

After everything that happened the night before, I didn't think Caleb would come home for Valentine's Day.

But right before midnight, he stumbled in, reeking of alcohol.

Honestly, ever since he got together with Kayla, he hardly ever came back. They had a place across the river from his office. It was a massive luxury condo with a stunning view.

I knew that building. Back when they were still pouring the foundation, I stood with Caleb outside the construction site, pointing at the renderings behind the fence.

"One day, I want to buy the top floor in that middle tower," I'd said with a smile. "It'll be our home after we get married. River view, perfect sunsets. It'll be ours."

The building was finished now, and Caleb bought that dream apartment.

But it was for another woman.

"Why are you here?" I asked.

I leaned against the stair railing, looking down at Caleb. He stood swaying in the middle of the living room, drunk out of his mind.

My voice came out flat and emotionless.

He scowled, clearly annoyed. "This is my house!"

I blinked. It had been a long time since I heard him say that, and the words felt foreign.

For a moment, the room fell into a weird, heavy silence.

His ragged breathing, thick with alcohol, made my stomach churn.

And I gagged. More than once.

Caleb's face twisted with anger.

He grabbed me and yanked me down the stairs, shoving me up against the floor-to-ceiling window. Outside, the dim garden lights cast shadows across his face, cutting sharp lines into his usually smooth features.

"You think I'm disgusting?"

I stared at him, speechless.

Was that even a question?

After everything?

For years, Caleb had buried himself in other women, chasing revenge for something I never even got the chance to explain. Every time I tried to talk to him, to set the record straight, he'd shut me down with that same cold, bitter voice.

"Lily," he growled. "You don't get to bring up the past. When I begged you in the rain, that was the last chance for us. And you blew it."

His grip tightened around my wrist. It hurt, but I smiled and nodded anyway.

"You're right. I do think you're disgusting."

Caleb's eyes narrowed, and he sneered. "Not as disgusting as you were back then."

With that, he grabbed my wrist and shoved me down onto the living room couch.

I struggled with everything I had, landing a hard kick to his thigh. He doubled over in pain, and I took the chance to make a run for it. Just as the clock struck midnight and I was nearly at the front door, he caught up to me and yanked me back.

One rough pull, and I was yanked back straight into his arms.

His body was hot and solid.

Caleb grabbed me from behind, his grip like a vise. Then his hands went to my clothes, tearing at the fabric like a man possessed.

Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe Kayla hadn't satisfied him. Whatever the reason, his touch was brutal, like he had no intention of letting me go.

"Let go of me!" I screamed, my voice raw and cracking.

A wave of nausea surged through me, followed by a sharp pain in my abdomen. It made everything worse.

I didn't know how much longer I could stay on my feet, or if I'd survive this almost torturous love.

"Lily, this is your duty as my wife!"

I fought him with everything I had, but it wasn't enough.

He slammed my hands against the wall, pinning me in place.

The brass vase by the entryway gleamed like a mirror, reflecting my twisted, contorted face.

It felt like I had been dragged through a century's worth of chaos and ruin. Just when I thought I was really going to die there, Caleb scooped me up and carried me into the bedroom.

Tears blurred everything. I curled up under the covers and didn't move an inch. My whole body ached, every inch of me burning and bruised. I bit down hard on my lower lip, trying to stay silent through the pain that wouldn't stop.

Caleb sat on the edge of the bed. He leaned down, pressing his forehead to mine.

"Lily, what am I supposed to do with you?"

His voice was tender, almost affectionate. It was just like the way he used to sound back when he loved me the most.

If not for the pain, so real and gut-wrenching, I might've believed that everything that happened before was just a bad dream.

Caleb must have felt my trembling and resistance. A warm droplet fell onto my cheek.

I kept my eyes shut. I didn't move or say a word.

"I just wanted you to love me," Caleb said softly. "Like you used to. If you'd just act sweet again, I'd forgive everything. Why won't you? Why don't you feel anything, no matter what I do?"

It wasn't that I felt nothing.

It was that I was dying.

And long before my body gave out, my heart had already stopped trying.

-

Later, I went to the hospital and got a prescription for some painkillers.

The doctor studied my charts, then let out a heavy sigh. "There's no good treatment available here right now, but I've heard of a hospital overseas. They have an experimental drug. It could give you another three to five years."

I smiled and looked at him.

"So I'll still die in the end, right?"

He nodded. And for a moment, he looked even more heartbroken than I did.

"Then I'll pass," I said. "A few more years wouldn't be a gift, not for me."

My friend, Haley Lloyd, was waiting in the car outside.

As soon as I got in, I coughed up blood.

She panicked, grabbing tissues and pressing them to my lips. Her hands shook, and tears fell one after another onto the center console.

"Lily, why are you doing this? What's the point?"

I leaned back, eyes tilted toward the hospital building just beyond the windshield. People came and went, living their lives.

"Caleb is the kind of person who can't handle even the smallest failure. That's why I left without a word back then. And now... I can't explain it anymore."

I balled up the bloodied tissue in my hand and tossed it into the little trash bag in the car.

"I know exactly what he wants, but I'm not the person I was when I was twenty, Haley. And he's not the same boy he used to be either. We've missed out on so many years, and we've both changed since then. There's nothing left between us now except hate."

Haley looked at me, forcing her tears back with sheer will.

"Then why get married in the first place? And why not just get a divorce?"

I sighed. "I'm going to die anyway, so I just want to help him fulfill a wish he had back then. When I left him, I did feel guilty."

I went on handling my affairs, tying up loose ends.

I destroyed or sold off most of the things that once belonged to me, just so Caleb wouldn't be annoyed by the sight of them after I was gone.

Maybe if Kayla tried hard enough, she really could replace me completely.

-

Haley found a buyer interested in taking over my studio.

They made a generous offer, but their condition was to have my mother's last masterpiece. I was curious and wanted to meet this buyer in person, but the request was denied.

I sat in the darkroom, staring at my mother's painting. Nothing in the studio had changed since she died.

I racked my brain trying to guess who that mysterious buyer could be.

A sharp pain spread up from my stomach into my chest. I took a painkiller and was about to close up when Kayla pushed the door open.

"What would it take for you to leave Caleb?"

She impatiently slid off her glasses and sat down on the couch, her anger completely exposed. There was no trace of the sweet act from that night.

I poured her a cup of tea and set it in front of her.

"You saw everything for yourself. It's not that I don't want a divorce."

Kayla sneered.

"Drop the act. I know Caleb hates you. He hates that you betrayed him back then, and that's why he's been tormenting you like this, making you a joke in front of everyone. But Lily, you and I both know the truth. If you really wanted to leave, he couldn't stop you."

Something sank deep inside me.

I never imagined Caleb would share our private business with Kayla. Maybe Kayla really was different from the other women.

None of those women he used to get under my skin ever lasted more than three days by his side, and he never told any of them about us.

Maybe, in some moments when he wasn't paying attention, Caleb started to hesitate. Kayla wasn't just a tool to humiliate or provoke me anymore. She was someone he actually cared about.

I sighed and smiled.

"Since he told you so much, then you should already know that I've got a bad temper, right?"

As soon as the words left my mouth, I grabbed the teacup on the table and flung it at Kayla. The tea wasn't boiling, but it was hot enough to make her scream in shock.

Her face instantly flushed bright red, and a few tea leaves clung to her hair, trembling like they might fall any second.

"What the heck do you think you're doing?!" she yelled.