Hard to Love

Mom and Dad came to the capital. Tonight we're having dinner at Uncle Yan's house. You and Tingli come back together later.] During the break before elective class, the classroom was noisy with people constantly coming and going to take their seats. Shi Sui stared at the screen for a long time before slowly replying with an "okay." Suddenly, there was a commotion. Shi Sui's elbow was nudged by her roommate Xue Jing, whose eyes were excitedly drifting as she signaled her to look behind. Shi Sui turned her head and happened to meet eyes with the person coming through the back door. She stiffened and quickly turned her face away. It was a completely instinctive reaction, too late to remedy. Very bad. He didn't like her avoiding him. "Yan Tingli, it's really Yan Tingli." Xue Jing was still sighing in her ear, "There were rumors before that he would choose this course. Strange, why would he choose a course from our major?" "Western Art History" had nothing to do with Yan Tingli's major. "Could it be that there's a girl he likes in our college?" Lin Anran gossiped nearby. "No way, such a cold person-you could tell me he has no emotions and I'd believe it." As she spoke, Xue Jing's gaze also followed. Those secretly watching like them were only more, not fewer. Some people are destined to never be ordinary, and Yan Tingli was exactly that type. Recommended for admission to University A's Institute for Interdisciplinary Information Sciences, then selected first with a crushing lead for the school's Zhiban program created for top talents. In a place where prodigies gathered, he could still leave everyone in the dust. The abnormally difficult courses of Zhiban, Yan Tingli aced them all with perfect grades, his crushing strength becoming an inescapable shadow for all the other valedictorians. University A had many geniuses every year. But a genius with such naturally gifted looks, only one Yan Tingli appeared in several years. In last year's special scholarship defense live stream, Yan Tingli's achievements were so heaven-defying, combined with that face comparable to a celebrity's, he caused a sensation throughout the entire school. Very coincidentally, Yan Tingli sat quite close to them, in the only empty seat diagonally to their right. His indifferent eyes lowered, finger tapping the screen, probably sending messages. His finger bones were distinct, with faint veins spreading. "Yan Tingli is the sexiest man I've ever seen." Art students had the keenest eyes. Lin Anran whispered: "A face of sexual coldness, hands with explosive sexual tension. I want him to be my hand model." Xue Jing propped her chin in agreement: "I'm different-I want him to be my body model." "Then go try it, don't just talk big." "I'm lustful, not crazy." Xue Jing said. Moreover, Yan Tingli had had no romantic rumors for so long, he was difficult to pursue. Approaching him would just be asking for rejection. "Right, Sui Sui?" Shi Sui didn't hear. Her gaze was fixed on her phone screen-a message Yan Tingli had just sent. [Wait for me after class, we'll go back together] "I'm talking to you, what are you looking at so intently?" Xue Jing tugged her sleeve. Shi Sui hurriedly turned off the screen. She responded reluctantly: "Celebrity gossip." History class was typically lengthy, and the old professor spoke slowly, making this late autumn afternoon even more drowsy. After class, Shi Sui told her roommates about her situation. Knowing she lived locally, Xue Jing and Lin Anran waved goodbye. After the crowd dispersed, the classroom became unusually quiet. Shi Sui packed her backpack very slowly. At dusk, someone's figure blocked the light, finger knuckles tapping twice on the desk. Shi Sui's spine stiffened as she looked up. A few rays of light folded through the glass window, falling on Yan Tingli's eyes and brows, but didn't add any warmth to his cold, desolate features. Yan Tingli hated wasting time. Her deliberate dawdling would further consume his limited patience. Since the last time, they hadn't seen each other for half a month. At the beginning of the semester, the college organized a field sketching trip, and Shi Sui didn't tell Yan Tingli. She disappeared for half a month as soon as she left, only returning yesterday. Their last contact was when Yan Tingli told her to come to the apartment. After she shared the sketching location, she very stubbornly turned off her phone. The method was childish, only satisfying momentary defiance. Belated fear surfaced. Shi Sui: "Yan Tingli, I-" "What did you call me?" Shi Sui's chin was pinched by him, his fingertips very cold, not using force. "...Brother Tingli." The address he liked to hear in bed. "Mm." But he wasn't responding to her. Yan Tingli pressed his earpiece, answering the other end: "Found her. Coming back now." His hand had already moved from her chin to her delicate earlobe. Rubbing hard. The cold touch-Shi Sui didn't dodge, knowing that dodging would make it worse. Yan Tingli was sick. Always so unscrupulous like this. The car stopped at the Yan family's entrance. The driver was the Yan family's Old Chen. When parking, he glanced at the rearview mirror. For the entire forty-minute drive, except when necessary, the two had no further communication. Counting the time since Shi Sui moved in during the second semester of senior year, it had been two years now. Two years, and she still couldn't exchange more than a few words with Young Master Yan. "Thank you, Uncle Chen." Old Chen opened the back door, and Shi Sui got out. "You're too kind, Miss Shi." Shi Sui wore a light-colored fuzzy cardigan, black hair to her back, spoke gently and softly, and had shallow dimples. A lovable personality, yet somehow not close to Yan Tingli. He had watched Young Master Yan grow up, though quiet, he was refined and polite. Strange. Outside, Shi Sui saw her father's car. Without looking back, she ran into the door and saw her parents in front of the reception hall. "Mom and Dad!" Shi Sui rushed over to hug them. Li Yin hadn't seen her daughter in a long time either, immediately hugging Shi Sui back and kissing her. Shi Yue, beside them, shook his head: "Such a big girl now, still so impetuous. Look at Tingli, learn from him more." Learn my ass. Shi Sui said nothing. "This child." Shi Yue laughed, his gaze turning to Yan Tingli, who was walking calmly from the door. The latter greeted them clearly and distantly. Shi Sui also greeted Uncle and Aunt. She had stayed with the Yan family for half a year during senior year, and during college often received the Yan family's care. Mr. and Mrs. Yan had extraordinary status, and Shi Sui was very grateful to them. Needless to say about Shi Yue-his company had problems two years ago, with debt collectors outside. He and his wife were overwhelmed, constantly traveling for business, unable to take care of Shi Sui. Their time in the capital was short, their foundation shallow. With their daughter in the crucial senior year, after consideration, they could only entrust her to the only reliable acquaintance in the capital, college roommate Yan Zecheng. But while Shi Yue used to call Yan Zecheng brother after graduation and entering society, some requests became harder to voice. He was just an ordinary person who tested into college from a small place, while Yan Zecheng came from a superior family background. Even before graduation, his family had paved the way for him. He had a smooth life, single-handedly founding Qisheng Technology, a nationally renowned tech company, already a prominent figure in the capital. When Shi Yue approached Yan Zecheng, he didn't have much confidence, but Yan Zecheng agreed without hesitation. Now that the company had weathered the difficulties, the favor owed to the Yan couple needed long-term repayment. With a good wine filled, Shi Yue raised his glass emotionally to give thanks. "Sui Sui is very well-behaved. I just regret not being able to have such a daughter." Mrs. Yan, Song Jie, said. Mrs. Yan was a very elegant and refined woman, and Yan Tingli's temperament resembled his mother's. But compared to Uncle Yan, who was familiar with Dad, Mrs. Yan gave her a more intuitive sense of distance. Even knowing these words were mostly polite, Shi Sui still responded with an obedient smile. Since Song Jie said this, Shi Yue naturally had to praise Yan Tingli in return. The flowery vocabulary used on him didn't seem exaggerated at all. "Tingli studies..." Shi Yue had drunk too much and couldn't remember for a long time. Yan Tingli: "Artificial intelligence." "Artificial intelligence is good! Like father, like son-in the future you'll inherit your father's mantle!" Speaking of his son, Yan Zecheng's face also showed satisfaction. Yan Tingli made an acknowledging sound, his actions not stopping as he continued wiping his hands with wet wipes. It seemed like a response, but only Shi Sui could see he hadn't thought about it at all-beneath his mild exterior was complete indifference. "Will you settle there in the future?" Yan Zecheng asked. Shi Yue clinked glasses with him: "Doing e-commerce now, there are still more opportunities in Hangzhou." Yan Zecheng: "With Sui Sui here, we'll take care of her, don't worry." "Of course I'm not worried. Back then, after Sui Sui's college entrance exam, we wanted her to apply to southern schools to come back to us, but she refused. When daughters grow up, we let them be." Speaking of this, Shi Sui felt simply indignant. The word regret wasn't enough to describe her current feelings. Regretting being deceived by Yan Tingli's surface appearance, being guided by him to apply in the capital, and now being manipulated by him! When Shi Yue and his wife came this time, it was just a temporary business stop. Hearing that her parents had an early morning flight tomorrow and were leaving again, Shi Sui's eyes reddened, forcibly holding back tears. By the time dinner ended, it was already late. The servants cleared the dining table while Shi Yue continued chatting with the Yan parents. About to leave, Li Yin couldn't bear to part with her daughter, pulling Shi Sui aside to speak intimately. Previously, though they were busy with work, they had always kept their daughter by their side. From childhood to now, Shi Sui had never been this far from them. Now, with the family separated by great distance, they could mostly only meet during holidays. "Mom still regrets not having you apply to the G Academy of Fine Arts back then-right next to home, how nice that would have been." Shi Sui hugged Li Yin: "I'll come over after graduation to be with Mom and Dad." Li Yin smiled, thinking her daughter was just comforting her. After all, when applying for colleges, she would rather risk not getting in than give up trying for University A. Remembering something, Li Yin softly instructed a few more things: "Oh right, Uncle and Aunt Yan are quite busy. If anything happens, tell Mom and Dad first, don't trouble them too much..." Li Yin's meaning, Shi Sui understood. No matter how polite the Yan family was, she was ultimately a guest. Moreover, some gaps couldn't be bridged by sentiment alone. But those boundaries that shouldn't be crossed had already been transgressed long ago. Li Yin suddenly: "Hey, Tingli..." Shi Sui: "He and I aren't familiar." The atmosphere froze for a moment. Li Yin lightly pinched her daughter's arm. Belatedly sensing something, Shi Sui turned around. Yan Tingli was coming down from upstairs. Standing on the staircase not far away, looking down from above with an indifferent expression. Li Yin smoothly redirected the conversation. "Mom and Dad are leaving." She ruffled Shi Sui's hair. "Tingli, when we're not here, please be tolerant of Sui Sui." "Of course," Yan Tingli stepped downstairs, "I'll see you and Uncle off." Li Yin smiled and nodded. Toward Yan Tingli, Li Yin genuinely admired him. But only to that extent. The distance with the Yan family was just right as it was now-they couldn't lose their sense of propriety. Standing in the night wind watching her parents' car lights disappear into the distance, Shi Sui felt empty inside. "Are you going back tonight?" Yan Zecheng asked them both. "Yes." "No." Two voices fell simultaneously. Yan Tingli's gaze lightly swept past Shi Sui, who turned her head away, avoiding eye contact. Shi Sui said in a muffled voice: "It's too late today, the dorm has curfew. I plan to go back tomorrow." Yan Zecheng nodded: "What about you, going back to school?" Yan Tingli curved his lips slightly, with a few degrees of cold meaning. "Since she's not going back, then I won't go back either." Shi Sui's eyelid twitched. But no one present showed any unusual reaction. "Then have Old Chen take you back tomorrow." Yan Zecheng said. Yan Zecheng didn't stay at the Yan residence at night-he rarely rested here. Shi Sui didn't delve into the reasons. The servants were on the first floor, Song Jie lived in the master bedroom on the second floor. Song Jie's frequency of staying home wasn't high either. Today, as usual, she wanted to get her beauty sleep and entered her room very early. She was always like this, not particularly concerned about anything, not even her son Yan Tingli. In the Yan family, everyone had their affairs. One more outsider didn't seem to affect anything. Shi Sui's room was on the third floor of the villa, originally Yan Tingli's piano room and collection room. Because of its good orientation, Yan Zecheng converted it into a bedroom for her. Correspondingly, across the hall was Yan Tingli's room. Shi Sui ignored the footsteps behind her, almost running upstairs into her room and slamming the door shut. Her palms were damp, the phone screen fogged with moisture. Lighting it up, there was a message Yan Tingli had sent during dinner, telling her to come to the apartment tonight. What would happen at the apartment was obvious. She wouldn't go. The footsteps going upstairs outside remained unhurried. Until they stopped. Shi Sui pricked up her ears, hearing the footsteps seem to go to the opposite room, and sighed in relief. At least at home, with Mrs. Yan still there, he wouldn't dare to- The next second. Her phone jumped with a new message, a concise and clear demand. [I want to kiss you.] [I don't want to.] Shi Sui replied. [Be good, open the door.] He used "be good." Like coaxing someone, but a signal that his patience was exhausted. Shi Sui ignored it. The room had a fingerprint lock-if she didn't open it, Yan Tingli couldn't get in. "Beep." The sound of the door unlocking. Before she could react, Shi Sui was already pressed against the door. Yan Tingli's scent overwhelmed her like a tide. Like the man himself-initially cold, then invasive and lingering intensely on the skin with strong, thick possession. Shi Sui shook her head, struggling to swallow everything his mouth delivered. Yan Tingli watched coldly, his cool finger bones gripping her delicate neck, pressing against her lips, and asking: "Told you to open the door, didn't you see?"