
Only Me to Count On
Only Me to Count On Chapter 1
The silence in St. Mary's Cathedral was deafening.
I stood at the altar in my custom Vera Wang gown, the silk cascading around me like spilled cream, clutching a bouquet of white lilies that had cost more than most people's monthly rent. Two hundred empty mahogany pews stretched behind me, their burgundy velvet cushions pristine and untouched. The afternoon sunlight filtered through stained glass windows, casting rainbow shadows across the marble floor—a beautiful backdrop for absolutely no one.
My phone buzzed against my thigh for the fifth time. Nathan's name flashed on the screen, but when I swiped to answer, it went straight to voicemail. Again.
"This is ridiculous," I whispered to the empty cathedral, my voice echoing off the vaulted ceiling.
The wedding coordinator, Mrs. Chen, had given up her cheerful facade an hour ago. She now stood near the entrance, whispering urgently into her headset, probably trying to figure out how to explain to the caterers that no one was coming to eat the seven-course meal we'd planned for months.
I pulled out my phone again, my fingers trembling as I opened Instagram. The notification had been haunting me for the past twenty minutes, but I hadn't been brave enough to look.
There it was: a video post from my stepfather's account. "Welcome home, Serena Sterling!" The caption was accompanied by champagne glass emojis and heart-eye faces.
I pressed play.
The airport terminal buzzed with activity as my family—my mother Margaret, stepfather Richard, and my half-brother Derek—stood in a tight circle, their faces glowing with genuine joy. And there was Serena, my stepsister, looking effortlessly stunning in a cream cashmere coat, her dark hair falling in perfect waves as she laughed at something Derek said.
But it wasn't Serena that made my blood run cold.
It was Nathan.
My fiancé—my supposed-to-be-husband-in-thirty-minutes Nathan—stood directly behind Serena, his arm casually draped around her waist like it belonged there. His smile was the same one he'd given me when he proposed six months ago, except now it was directed at her. The way he looked at Serena, the way his fingers splayed possessively across her hip, the way he leaned down to whisper something in her ear that made her throw her head back and laugh—
My hands started shaking so violently I nearly dropped the phone.
The video continued for another thirty seconds. Thirty seconds of my family fawning over the golden child who'd just returned from her prestigious fashion program at Parsons Paris. Thirty seconds of Nathan acting like he'd never heard of Harper Sterling, let alone promised to marry her today.
The bouquet slipped from my numb fingers, lilies scattering across the altar steps like fallen snow.
My phone rang.
Nathan's name appeared on the screen, and for a moment, hope fluttered in my chest. Maybe there was an explanation. Maybe this was all some terrible misunderstanding.
"Hello?" My voice cracked.
"Harper." His tone was flat, irritated, like I was interrupting something important. "Look, don't be so dramatic about this, okay?"
Dramatic? I was standing alone in a cathedral, wearing a wedding dress, surrounded by two hundred empty seats, and he was calling me dramatic?
"Nathan, where are you? Everyone's waiting—" I stopped. No one was waiting. That was the problem.
"The wedding can be postponed," he said, and I could hear voices in the background. Familiar voices. My family's voices. "Serena just got back from Paris. She's the pride of the family right now, Harper. Surely you can understand that this is important."
The pride of the family. The words hit me like physical blows.
"But Nathan, we planned—"
"We'll reschedule. Maybe next month. I have to go."
The line went dead.
I stared at the phone screen until it went black, then stared at my reflection in the dark surface. My makeup was still perfect—I'd spent three hours in the chair this morning, letting the artist paint my face into something worthy of the Sterling family name. My hair was swept into an elegant chignon, secured with the diamond pins that had belonged to Nathan's grandmother. I looked like the perfect bride.
For a wedding that didn't exist.
Slowly, mechanically, I reached behind my neck and unclasped my grandmother's pearl necklace. The pearls felt cold and heavy in my palm. I set them carefully on the altar next to the abandoned bouquet.
Next came the diamond pins. One by one, I pulled them from my hair, letting the carefully constructed updo fall around my shoulders in waves. The pins joined the pearls, creating a small pile of discarded dreams.
Finally, I reached for the zipper at the back of my dress. The silk whispered against my skin as it pooled at my feet, leaving me standing in nothing but my white lace lingerie and the engagement ring that suddenly felt like a shackle around my finger.
I stepped out of the dress and picked it up, smoothing the fabric with trembling hands. Fold by fold, I arranged it neatly on the front pew, the way my mother had taught me to care for expensive things. The veil went next, spread carefully over the silk like a shroud.
The wedding cake stood in the corner, three tiers of vanilla sponge with buttercream roses, untouched and perfect. The engagement ring box sat open on a side table, the matching wedding bands gleaming against black velvet.
I didn't cry. I couldn't. The pain was too deep, too raw for tears. Instead, I stood there for a long time, memorizing every detail of what should have been the happiest day of my life. The flowers that would wilt. The cake that would be thrown away. The dress that would hang in my closet like a ghost.
When I finally walked out of the cathedral in my street clothes, the setting sun painted the sky the color of blood.
At home, I sat at my desk and opened the leather-bound journal I'd kept since college. My handwriting was steady as I wrote: "Abandoned List—Item #47: Wedding day. Zero guests in attendance."
I flipped to a fresh page and stared at the words I'd written there weeks ago, during one of my darker moments when Nathan had canceled another dinner, another date, another promise.
Two words, written in bold capital letters: FINAL ULTIMATUM.
My fingers traced the letters as a cold smile spread across my face.
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