One Last Regret

Elara and I were college schoolmates. While she was the belle of the Literature department, I was just one of the countless ordinary faces in the crowd.

No. I was the one everyone avoided.

We met at a campus party. I was being surrounded and bullied when Elara stepped in and pulled me out of it.

While the other students tried to persuade her not to get involved, they told her I was a jinx. They said my father had fallen from a construction site when I was little and died.

Two years later, my mother, who had depended on me, passed away from exhaustion and illness. I was sent to live with my elderly grandmother. There, I spent what little carefree childhood I had.

When I was ten, my grandmother also died. From that day on, I was sent to an orphanage.

Everyone there called me Jinx. They said all my relatives had died because I brought them misfortune. Everyone hated me and picked on me together.

The only person who treated me kindly, the director, passed away from illness not long after I arrived. Her death only solidified my title as Jinx.

From then on, I endured eight long years of bullying.

Until I met Elara. She was like a little angel, adding a trace of warmth to my dark life.

Even though she was clearly afraid herself, she still comforted me, "Don’t take their words to heart. None of that was your fault. You deserve all the beauty this world has to offer."

In that instant, I fell for her beyond saving.

Unfortunately, she had a boyfriend. His name was Drew. From that moment on, I began a long, silent crush.

In our sophomore year, Drew went abroad to study. The two of them had a fierce argument and parted on bad terms.

I seized the opportunity and pursued her desperately.

Everyone around me laughed at my wishful thinking. They said Elara was the moon above the clouds, and I was nothing more than filthy mud.

"A jinx like you? How could you ever be worthy of Elara?"

I considered giving up, but I refused. Who were they to strip me of my right to pursue happiness? So I chased after Elara for five years.

The day she accepted my confession, I was over the moon. I thought I could finally stand openly by her side.

Then Drew returned to the country, and my beautiful dream was shattered.

Elara’s gaze was gradually drawn back to him. She began moving closer and closer to Drew.

That night, Elara lay on the bed, drunk beyond recognition, murmuring Drew’s name over and over.

In that moment, it felt as if someone had grabbed my heart and squeezed. Were the years I spent with her still no match for the one year she had with him?

I started to feel insecure and restless. I kept telling myself it was only natural.

Drew had been her first love. Of course, he would be hard to forget. It didn’t matter. I was the one by her side now. As long as Elara was still with me, nothing else mattered.

Until she slept with Drew, I could no longer lie to myself. I never believed a girl’s purity was defined by something so small.

But Elara had said she was frigid. Even when I accidentally brushed against her, she would recoil in disgust.

Now she could lie in the same bed as Drew and sleep with him?