
Leaving my genius Asperger husband and son
Chapter 3
The glowing monitor of Julian's computer reflected in my eyes. I reached for the mouse, ready to crack his encrypted folders.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. The sudden noise made me jump.
I pulled the device out. A calendar alert flashed on the screen. *Lucas's 8th Birthday.*
I stared at the glowing letters. The investigation could wait. My son needed me.
I spent the next six hours in the kitchen. I measured almond flour. I scraped fresh vanilla beans. Lucas despised artificial colors. He hated excessive sugar. For seven years, my kitchen was the only bakery he trusted. I frosted the edges perfectly white, ensuring no crumbs broke the smooth surface. He demanded geometric perfection.
"Mom, open the door," Lucas commanded from the foyer.
I wiped my hands on my apron. "Is your father home early?"
"I expedited an invitation."
I unlocked the front door and pulled the handle.
Mandy stood on the porch. She wore a tailored red dress and held a massive, neon-blue fondant cake.
"Theresa!" Mandy beamed. She stepped inside without waiting for an invitation. "I hope I am not intruding."
"You are," I said.
"Aunt Mandy!" Lucas bypassed me completely. His eyes locked onto the blue monstrosity. "The structural integrity of that icing is fascinating."
"I bought it from that French place downtown," Mandy announced. She walked past me and set it directly on my dining table. Right next to my homemade vanilla cake.
"Lucas does not eat food dye," I stated. I moved to intercept, placing myself between my son and the table. "It overstimulates his nervous system. You know this, Mandy."
"Actually, Theresa, exposure to new stimuli encourages neuroplasticity," Mandy countered smoothly. She handed Lucas a silver cake cutter. "Want to do the honors, genius?"
"Affirmative."
"Lucas, stop." I pointed at the white pastry. "I spent six hours on your cake. The vanilla bean. The one you specifically requested last week."
"Variables change," Lucas replied. He sliced into the bright blue sponge.
He lifted a piece to his mouth. I held my breath. I waited for the inevitable meltdown. I waited for him to scream about the texture, the artificial sweetness, the disruption to his routine.
He chewed. He swallowed.
"The sucrose levels are optimal," Lucas announced.
"See?" Mandy smiled at me, her lips curling at the edges. "He just needed a little push out of his comfort zone. You baby him too much, Theresa."
"I am his mother. I know his dietary restrictions."
"Restrictions limit growth," Mandy said.
"Have a piece of mine, Lucas." I pushed my glass plate forward. "Just one bite. Please."
Mandy leaned down. She rested her manicured hand on Lucas's shoulder. "You know, buddy, too many cakes might clutter the table. We need space for your presents. Your dad bought you that new drone you wanted."
Lucas analyzed the table. He looked at my cake. He looked at Mandy.
"This one is redundant," he said.
He picked up the heavy glass platter. Before I could process his trajectory, he tilted it over the stainless-steel trash can.
The cake hit the bottom with a heavy, wet thud. Frosting splattered against the plastic liner.
My hands went completely numb.
"Lucas!" I yelled.
He adjusted his glasses, utterly unbothered. "I optimized our surface area. The table is now efficient."
Mandy covered her mouth, feigning shock. "Oh, Theresa, I am so sorry. He is just so literal, is he not? I did not mean for him to throw it away."
She was not sorry. Her eyes danced with victory.
Tears burned my vision. My throat tightened until breathing became impossible.
"I need to get the cleaning supplies," I choked out, spinning around.
I retreated to the dark hallway. I pressed my back against the cool plaster wall, dragging a hand across my damp cheeks.
The front door clicked open. Julian's heavy footsteps echoed on the hardwood.
"Did I miss the sugar rush?" Julian asked.
"Dad!" Lucas chirped. "Aunt Mandy brought a superior confection."
"Is that right?" Julian's voice held a soft chuckle. "Mandy, you should not spoil him."
"It is impossible not to," Mandy said. "He is my favorite guy. You two are my family."
A pause stretched in the dining room. I held my breath. I waited for Julian to correct her. I waited for him to remind her of his actual wife standing just rooms away.
"We love you too, Mandy," Julian said.
His tone was gentle. Warm.
My heart stopped beating.
"I love you, Aunt Mandy," Lucas echoed.
The words slammed into my chest. They shattered every excuse I had built over the last decade.
*We love you.*
For ten years, I blamed them for never saying they loved me, but now they say it so easily to Mandy.
I used to think they just had a speech impediment, but now I understand, they just don't love me.
I stumbled backward toward the balcony doors before anyone could see my face crack apart.
Cold night air slammed against my skin the moment I stepped outside. The city lights below blurred into streaks of gold through my tears. I gripped the metal railing so hard my fingers ached.
Inside the dining room, laughter continued.
Mandy's bright voice. Lucas explaining drone specifications in excited detail. Julian's low chuckle threading between them like he belonged there. Like they were a perfect family portrait framed behind glass.
And I was the ghost standing outside it.
I pressed a trembling hand against my mouth to stop the sob escaping my throat.
For years, I defended them.
Julian was emotionally reserved, I told myself. Lucas struggled with emotional expression because of his condition. Love did not always need words. Love could exist in routines, in quiet companionship, in practical gestures.
I believed that. Desperately.
But tonight destroyed the lie.
They were capable of saying the words.
Just not to me.
The balcony door slid open behind me. I froze, but no footsteps followed. Through the narrow gap, I heard Mandy laugh softly.
"Honestly, Julian, Theresa gets too emotional over tiny things."
"Ignore her," Julian replied calmly. "She'll cool down eventually."
My chest tightened so violently it felt like my ribs were collapsing inward.
Ignore her.
Ten years of marriage reduced to two careless words.
I wiped my face roughly and pulled my phone from my pocket with shaking fingers. My contact list opened automatically to one familiar number.
Dad.
My thumb hovered above the screen for several seconds before I finally pressed call.
The line connected almost instantly.
"Theresa?" My father's deep voice carried quiet concern. "It's late. Is everything alright?"
A sob nearly escaped my throat again, but I swallowed it down.
I stared through the balcony glass at the family laughing without me.
Then I closed my eyes.
"Dad," I whispered, my voice breaking, "about returning home to take over the CTO position..."
I inhaled shakily.
"I've made my decision."
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