Leave Me Alone, Ex-husband

The apathy

As I lay there, naked, with his marks all over my body and a lingering warmth from our intimate encounter, I couldn't help but feel a sense of contentment. However, that blissful state quickly shatters when I hear him say those cold, detached words.

Confusion and a growing unease settle within me, like a dark cloud looming over our shared intimacy.

I search his eyes, hoping to find a trace of the love and tenderness that have just enveloped us. But what I find instead is an icy distance, a void that sends a chill down my spine.

His words seem to cut through the air like shards of glass, slicing through the fragile bubble of hope that has momentarily surrounded us.

"I want a divorce." His voice rings out, devoid of any emotion.

The impact of his words hit me like a physical blow, stealing the breath from my lungs. My mind races, trying to comprehend what I have just heard.

Why is he saying this? Was it something I had done wrong? Did I fail to please him just now?

At that moment, I cling to the belief that his sudden coldness stems from my perceived failure to please him. The marks he left on my body now feel like cruel reminders of my inadequacy.

I wanted to explain to him that my performance had been affected by the pregnancy and that it wasn't a reflection of my love or desire for him. But before the words could escape my trembling lips, he silenced me with a dismissive wave.

His next revelation hits me like a thunderbolt.

"Megan has returned," he says.

The name Megan starts to echo in my ears, a haunting melody that shatters the remnants of my torn heart.

The ex-girlfriend he has carried within him, the lingering attachment that has always sparked my fears, has finally returned to reclaim him.

Shock and disbelief wash over me in waves. The weight of betrayal and heartache bore down upon my chest, making it difficult to breathe.

How could he discard the bond we had shared, so callously?

"And don’t forget about the terms in the contract," he reminds me. "It clearly states that we can end this marriage after a year if we don’t develop feelings for each other. You failed to win my heart, Vivian."

His mention of the contract twists the knife deeper into my heart.

I hoped, against all odds, that our love would transcend those constraints. But now, he declares the end of our marriage with harsh words, stating that I failed to make him fall for me within the stipulated time.

This is too cruel.

He turns around and continues, "So, I am ending this meaningless marriage and starting over with Megan. I will send the divorce agreement. Read it carefully before signing it."

Tears well up in my eyes, blurring my vision as I struggle to make sense of his words. The dreams I have cherished and the hopes I have clung to now lie in ruins around me.

The mention of Megan intensifies the ache, cruelly reminding me that I can never fill the void she left behind. I can never replace her in his heart. Even though I know this reality, a storm of emotions rages within me.

I felt the tenderness and affection emanating from him just moments ago, intertwined in our intimate connection. Were those feelings merely an illusion? Had I been blind to the truth, deceiving myself with false hopes?

Questions swirl in my mind, demanding answers that will never fully satisfy the ache in my heart. I yearn to confront him.

But before I could gather the strength to voice my doubts, his phone intruded upon our fragile moment.

I can see how his eyes sparkle when he looks at the phone.

He quickly answers the call. "Megan… Hey, what’s up?"

Megan, the name that shattered my dreams, called him at this hour.

I want to scream, ‘Why?’

His conversation with her unfolds before my ears, each word laced with gentleness and sweetness I never witnessed when he spoke to me. The contrast cuts deeper than any blade, a visceral reminder that I can never match her.

Pain surges within me, threatening to overflow as I realize that asking him any question will be futile. He will never understand my feelings.

The love I poured into this marriage, the hopes I nurtured, had all been in vain.

My heart aches, not only from the rejection but also from the realization that I lost the battle for his affection.

As I blink my tears away, I make a decision. I can't bear the thought of enduring further heartache and clinging to a love that has proven itself unattainable.

"Okay, okay… I am coming. Now calm down. Yes, yes. I will be right there."

He ends the call and slips the phone into his pocket, moving his gaze toward me.

"I am going to see Megan. Take your time to think. I hope you will understand the situation and agree with me."

With a heavy heart, I muster a smile. "What is there to think? We already know the terms. I am ready to end this marriage."

Suppressing my tears, I roll out of bed and put on my clothes one by one, slowly. My hands are shaking, but I try to act normally.

"You start your life with Megan, and I will also start anew. We will be happy in our lives."

It is a bittersweet acknowledgment that I fought my battles and lost. At that moment, I allow a glimmer of self-love to emerge, promising myself that I deserve more than a love that can't be fully reciprocated.

The pain lingers in my heart, an ache that will take time to heal. But I smile at him as I turn around and face him. I can see the surprise on his face.

Why will he be surprised?

Maybe I am still hoping that he will reconsider ending this marriage. Perhaps, I still want to hear him say that he likes me and that he wants to continue this marriage. But I know it is only my imagination.

He has already said that he is going to reconcile with his ex-girlfriend. Why will he say he likes me?

I continue to smile, though it feels hollow and fragile, as I affirm my decision.

His expression twists into a mask of anger. The reasons behind his sudden fury elude me, adding another layer of bewilderment to an already tumultuous situation.

"Are you sure?" he asks. "I mean… you don't have to respond right away. Take your time to think, and… then let me know whatever your decision is."

"I have already decided," I say, knowing he will not change his decision even if I ask him to forget about Megan and stay with me. So, there is no use in wasting time.

"I wish you a successful and happy life with Megan." I offer him a smile.

"I see…"

A dry, bitter laugh escapes his lips, further stinging my wounded heart. Without a word, he storms out of the room and forcefully closes the door behind him, the echo reverberating through the empty space.

The silence envelops me soon. Tears erupt, flowing freely down my cheeks. The ache in my heart feels unbearable.

My hand finds its way to my belly, cradling the precious life growing within.

"I am sorry, baby," I whisper to my unborn child, for the decisions I made in the midst of this chaos.

Although I know it is a bit selfish, I have decided to keep my pregnancy from George. With his power and influence, he will take my child away from him as soon as he learns about it. I have already lost him, but I can’t lose my baby.

It was a choice tinged with a touch of self-preservation, a desperate attempt to safeguard the only part of him.

In this silence, I let the tears flow freely, releasing the pent-up emotions. The path ahead of me is filled with uncertainty, but I’ll navigate it with a fierce determination to love my child with my all heart. I will not let anyone take my baby away.