Forever Lost My Love

I couldn't forget Chad's cold voice outside the hospital room.

"It's not a bad thing. The baby shouldn't have existed anyway," he said.

After that, we reached an unspoken agreement. He kept playing the field, while I only wanted to keep my family afloat.

He could date anyone he liked as long as he didn't knock them up. Sadly, he broke his word, and my parents passed away, which rendered our marriage meaningless.

I didn't want to force it anymore.

I leaned against the car window, my breath hot. He calmed Rebecca down and walked back to me.

I just watched without feeling anything. He opened the door, put my arms around his neck, and carried me toward the ER.

Over his shoulder, I saw Rebecca sniffle and stare at me with contempt. As he passed, she reached for his shirt but grasped the air.

Chad strode forward, his handsome face set in stone. His serious expression always gave me false hope, like he'd come back no matter how far he strayed.

The illusion was finally shattered. I shook my head and snapped out of it.

"Chad, let's get a divorce," I said.

His steps faltered, but his eyes didn't meet mine.

"Huh?"

"Divorce. Okay?"

His expression shifted from anger to confusion. In the end, a chuckle escaped from his mouth.

"Why not wait a bit? Maybe in a few years..." he muttered, smirking at me, "I'll turn over a new leaf."

I smiled bitterly, and my eyes stung probably because the fever was spiking.

"What can I do? There is no spark left. Let's be buddies instead," I said, repeating what he had once said.

He stiffened. His jaw clenched so hard the muscles twitched.

"No spark left?" he muttered.

My eyes blurred with tears, but I maintained my smile. "We shouldn't have married. You were right back then. Grace Bennett? I'd rather be her buddy."

...

Chad didn't need to be my buddy anymore.

My family had leaned on him for a decade. Now we had become a burden. So, when word of our divorce spread, his family seemed relieved.

I signed the divorce papers despite my fever, then slumbered for two days.

When I woke up, Chad's name was on the last page of the agreement. I stared at it blankly, feeling lost and a little guilty.

The agreement wasn't exactly noble. Every time I dealt with his exes, he sent me money.

I saved every cent. Yet, I still angled for more in the property split.

He was too sharp not to see my greed, but he still signed it without hesitation. That left me lost for a while. Maybe he'd been waiting for me to bring up divorce the whole time.

Even if it cost him a fortune, it beat another decade of this mess.

My fever broke. I packed with what little energy I had. Ten years fit into two half-empty suitcases.

I dragged them downstairs, seen by the maids and the driver.

"Mad... Ms. Bennett, should we tell Mr. Caldwell you're leaving?" one of them asked.

I shook my head. "No need."

No one said goodbye, and no one stepped forward. They paused for a while, then went back to their tasks.

I felt a pang of sadness. Clearly, everyone in the house knew that I was just passing through.

The car slowly pulled away from the villa, but I didn't look back. The memories since my childhood ended right there.

The driver broke the silence. "Need a tissue?"

Only then did I realize my face was wet with tears. I should have felt free, but it took time for a bird freed from its cage to adjust.

At the airport, I got my boarding pass and swapped my SIM card. Once on the plane, I fell into a deep sleep.

These past days had left me exhausted and disoriented. Dreams provided the only escape for me to lick my wounds.

After a dozen hours, I landed across the ocean.