Five Years of Nothing

Yesterday, my fiancé told me he didn’t have time to come home with me for the holidays, but secretly, he had booked a flight to my hometown. I couldn’t help feeling a quiet thrill. Justin Baker had always been good at surprises back when we were dating. I just didn’t expect that now, when we were practically like an old married couple, he’d still do something like this.

I was just about to tell my dad the news when my stepsister suddenly dropped a message in the family group chat that she was bringing her boyfriend home for the holidays. The relatives in the family immediately started teasing her, wanting to see what he looked like.

The next second, photo after photo of her and Justin’s couple pictures flooded the chat.

“I told you he’s really handsome, right? And he’s the same age as me.”

“Oh wow, you locked him down so young? Dawn, you’re impressive.”

“Hmph, of course. He’s crazy about me.”

I stopped breathing. So that was why, when he found out I’d be spending the holidays at my mom’s place this year, he suddenly said he didn’t have time to come with me. It was because he already knew we wouldn’t run into each other.

My hands trembled as I sent him one last message.

[I’ve returned the engagement gift to you. We’re done.]

The younger relatives in the group chat were still asking Dawn Fowler for tips on how to win a guy over.

[A lot of girls pursued him, but I wasn’t one of them. Yeah, he was the one who pursued me, so I don’t really have experience with that. Maybe ask Trisha instead?]

I ignored the constant mentions blowing up my phone and simply muted the chat.

So that was it. The reason Justin Baker had been so hard to win over was that he already had someone in his heart, and I had spent three whole years just prying open a crack in something that was never real to begin with.

I let out a bitter laugh and went back to my room to pack. As I reached up to pull down a large suitcase from the top of the closet, something suddenly fell to the floor with a dull thud. It was an old phone. On instinct, I typed in Dawn’s birthday, and it unlocked. A group chat instantly popped up.

[Justin, you’re not actually going to marry Trisha, right?]

[Seriously, are you even going to break up with her? We’re all still for your wedding with Dawn.]

Justin replied with a voice message. He sounded like he was smiling when he said it.

“That’ll depend on Dawn.”

Then, he sent another voice message, but this time, it was Dawn’s voice.

“Hm… In that case, this year!”

At the end, there was a soft, playful squeal from her.

My heart started pounding violently. I gripped the phone so tightly it felt like I might crush it in my hand. Then, I opened their private chat. It was filled almost entirely with Dawn’s resentment toward me and Justin comforting her.

[As if stealing my dad from me since I was little wasn’t enough, now she wants to take his money too! I hate her so much! Justin, you won’t actually fall for her, will you? You know, I never had a father’s love growing up. You’re all I have. You’re the only person I can rely on.]

[Baby, think about it. She’s five years older than me. How could she ever be right for me? Don’t overthink it. You’re the only one for me, and you always will be.]

I couldn’t go on reading. It felt like I was drowning, like the air had been ripped from my lungs.

The room was warm, but a chill ran down my spine. As it turned out, not only did he not love me, but he also thought I was old. Every time he called me “his little ancient artifact” in that soft, affectionate tone… it wasn’t intimacy. It was a mockery.

Every time he proudly told others we were in an older woman–younger man relationship, underneath that pride was nothing but disgust. When he swore he’d take care of me, that I’d never need to touch my dad’s money, it wasn’t love. He was just afraid I’d compete with Dawn.

What a ridiculous five years it had been. Next year, I’d be thirty, and my entire twenties would end in lies and betrayal.

I stood in front of the mirror and smiled faintly. A fine line had appeared at the corner of my eye. As I lifted my hand and touched my reflection, the line seemed to disappear for a moment.

Was I… really that old? I didn’t know, but one thing I did know was that time doesn’t come back, and I couldn’t waste another second.

I wiped away my tears, quickly changed my flight, and dragged my suitcase toward the door. Suddenly, it burst open. Justin stood there, his hair messy from the wind, his face full of urgency that didn’t look fake.

“What happened? Why did you suddenly return the engagement gift I gave you? Is it because I’m not going home with you for the holidays, and you’re mad about it?”

Like always, he reached for my hand, but I stepped back. He froze for a second, then immediately put on a hurt expression.

“Hey, My Little Ancient Artifact, are you really mad? I’ve just been busy, you know that. I’m at a critical point in my career right now.”

Before, when he called me his little ancient artifact, I thought it was just a sweet nickname between lovers. Now, I understand that it was sarcasm.

“It’s fine. It’s my fault,” I said with a light laugh. “I’m just too old for you.”

His eyes widened, panic flashing across his face.

“W-Why would you say something like that all of a sudden? You know I like older women!”

Maybe, but definitely not someone five years older like me.

He kept going, still acting and pouring out how much he loved me. Even now, when he was about to go home with Dawn to meet her family, he wouldn’t stop lying to me.

I stared straight into his eyes.

“Justin, do you really want to marry me? Have you ever… actually loved me?”

His expression froze for a split second. He was about to answer, but I cut him off.

“I don’t love you anymore.”

Without waiting for his reaction, I walked out with my suitcase. I wasn’t going to play along anymore with that cheap performance.