Mom, Trust Me One Last Time

When Mom returned with Ryan, it was already late at night.

I drifted through the narrow staircase and quickly floated over to them. "You're back!"

They were chatting happily, completely absorbed in their conversation. Neither of them heard me. Mom even cupped Ryan's cheeks and kissed him several times in a row.

"Ryan, you're such a little genius. You even know about integrated circuits and Moore's Law! I'll make sure to nurture your talents so that one day you'll achieve even more than I ever did."

Integrated circuits and Moore's Law?

"I told Ryan about those! Mom, can you kiss me too?" I said.

I floated closer and tried to nuzzle against Mom's cheek, only to watch helplessly as I passed straight through her.

I nearly forgot. I was dead.

Mom never praised me when I was alive. How could I expect anything now that I was gone?

Ryan rubbed his cheek against her shoulder and promised earnestly, "I will."

Mom rubbed the back of her neck and glanced toward the window, looking slightly uneasy. "The windows are closed, aren't they? Why is there still a draft?"

Hearing that, Ryan quickly ran to the fireplace and turned up the heat.

Mom's expression softened immediately. She looked at him with warmth and pride. "Ryan, you really are my sweet boy. If only your lying sister were half as easy to handle as you…"

The warmth in Mom's eyes disappeared, replaced by impatience and irritation. She set her bag down and made her way to the attic.

"Jessie, have you realized your mistake yet?"

She pushed the door open and found me slumped over my knees, with my back turned to her. I stayed silent.

"You won't speak? Do you honestly think I can't detect the devil signal from the chip just because you're quiet?

"Jessie, you're 11 now. You're not a baby. Are you expecting me to coax you downstairs and tuck you in?"

I floated beside Mom and watched her face twitch with anger as she cranked the electric shock dial higher and higher.

"Mom, please, don't be angry. I'm already dead. I didn't mean to upset you..."

She still couldn't hear me. Her fury only intensified.

"Fine, then stay silent. Your Dad lied, cheated, and gambled. He ended up getting hacked to death, and I guess you want to follow in his footsteps. Since you're so fond of the attic, stay here tonight. Stay here forever!"

The door slammed with a thunderous bang, dislodging a loose wooden board from the attic ceiling.

I flinched, but for some reason, I felt a strange flicker of relief.

It seemed that Mom truly loved me. She just couldn't bear the thought of me turning out like Dad.

I floated after her downstairs and saw Ryan standing before a towering pile of Christmas presents.

"Mom, are all of these for me?"

Mom smiled. "Of course. Except for that workbook over there, they're all yours. How I wish I had only had you."

Could someone still feel heartache after dying?

It hurt even more than it ever did when I was alive.

Numb, I drifted back to the attic. At some point, a storm had begun to rage outside.

Thunder rolled, and lightning split the sky.

A loose board had fallen beside me. Above, the attic roof had collapsed in part, and sheets of rain poured through.

In an instant, I was drenched.

Years of electric shocks had left me terrified of thunderstorms. Each flash of lightning made my heart race. I always felt as if a bolt might hit me at any moment.

The storm intensified. I was still wearing the cartoon pajamas I had begged Mom for last year, but now they were miserably soaked through.

The heavy rain drenched everything, and in the corner, my thin body stayed still, teetering on the edge of collapse.

I floated helplessly above my body, trying to soothe myself, though I knew it was useless.

"It's okay. Everything will be over soon."